Navigating Conflict with Teammates and Coaches: A Guide for Young Athletes


Welcome to our latest installment of Confident Calm Clutch Car Ride Conversations! As we wrap up our month-long focus on relationships, today’s discussion is all about managing conflicts—something every athlete, or indeed every person, is bound to encounter at some point. Conflicts, whether with teammates, coaches, or even parents, are a normal part of life. However, the way we handle these conflicts can either strengthen or damage our relationships.

Why Conflict is Normal

Conflict is natural because we are all unique individuals with different thoughts, feelings, and life experiences. It often arises, especially among people who care deeply about a shared goal, like winning a game. While unresolved conflicts can create tension and disrupt team dynamics, effectively managing them is a skill that benefits not just athletes, but everyone in various aspects of life. Remember, the key is how you handle it.

Actionable Advice for Handling Conflict

1. Pause, Reflect, Cool Down

The first step in managing conflict is to pause when emotions are running high. Reacting immediately, especially out of anger or frustration, often escalates the situation. Instead, take a deep breath and acknowledge your feelings. Reflect on what’s really bothering you and ask if you’re reacting to the current situation or carrying over other frustrations. Only after a cool down should you approach the person involved, ready to communicate clearly and constructively.

2. Use Empathy and Perspective Taking

Understanding another person’s perspective can be incredibly helpful. By putting yourself in their shoes, you can avoid assumptions of negative intent and better understand their viewpoint. Use “I statements” to express your feelings without blame. For instance, instead of saying, “You never pass me the ball,” try “I feel frustrated when I didn’t get the ball because I thought I was in a good position to score.”

Engage in Thoughtful Conversations

To build on these conflict resolution strategies, engage in meaningful conversations with your family. Discuss:

- A previous conflict and how it was handled—what went well, what didn’t, and what could be done differently in the future.
- Parents, share an experience of resolving conflict productively and the lessons learned.
- Brainstorm as a family effective strategies to address conflicts calmly and respectfully.
- Consider how understanding another person’s perspective could help resolve future conflicts.


Thank you for joining the discussion on Confident Calm Clutch Car Ride Conversations. If you found this guide helpful, don’t miss future episodes by subscribing to the podcast. Share it with other parents and coaches who might find this helpful as well. For more tips on building mental toughness, check out my newsletter at www.confidentcalmclutch.com/newsletter or grab a copy of my book, *Confident, Calm, and Clutch: How to Build Confidence and Mental Toughness for Young Athletes Using Sports Psychology*.

Keep the conversation going and make every car ride count. Until next time!

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