Friday, January 24, 2025
Welcome to Confident Calm Clutch Car Ride Conversations with your host, Valerie Alston. In our podcast, we aim to ignite meaningful dialogue between parents and young athletes, focusing on mental toughness, resilience, and confidence. Whether you're on the way to practice or running errands, this podcast is your companion for building stronger relationships and lifelong skills, one car ride at a time.
Today, we're exploring a fundamental question: "Why do you play sports?" Despite its simplicity, this question holds significant depth, as every athlete's motivation can differ greatly. Understanding your child's why can bring clarity and purpose to their athletic journey, helping parents offer meaningful support.
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Understanding the 'Why'
It's crucial for parents to grasp their child's motivation for playing sports. Your child's reasons might include having fun, competing, making friends, or even building future skills. Acknowledging their unique motivations can strengthen the bond between you and your athlete while avoiding projecting your own aspirations onto them.
Personally, I began playing sports because my older brother did. Following him into activities like T-ball and Taekwondo was my 'why' when I was younger. However, as I grew older, my motivations evolved. From experimenting with various sports in elementary school to focusing on softball and discovering a love for volleyball in high school, my 'why' continually changed.
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The Evolution of Motivation
As children experiment, they naturally gravitate towards activities they enjoy the most or that align with their goals. This evolution is healthy and expected. When pressured by time constraints, children may narrow their focus, prioritizing certain sports over others, just as I chose softball over dance.
In high school, I encountered a turning point. Engaging in only one sport led me close to burnout. Fortunately, attending a small private school allowed me to explore volleyball purely for fun, while softball became a path to earning a scholarship. My motivations transformed, and volleyball became an outlet for relaxation and enjoyment.
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Facilitating Meaningful Discussions
Having an open conversation about your child's motivations can align expectations and minimize frustration. If a child plays purely for enjoyment, and the parents' expectations differ, tension may arise. Recognizing each child's personal motivation helps maintain focus on what truly matters.
Questions to Consider
To facilitate these impactful discussions, consider the following:
1. Why do you think your parents have encouraged you to play sports? For parents, share your reasons for encouraging sports participation.
2. Currently, why do you play sports? What do you enjoy most about the specific sport you're engaged in?
3. What do you hope to achieve through sports, and how can I, as your parent, support you?
4. Are there changes you'd like to make to your sports experience to enhance enjoyment or meaning?
Encourage honesty, listen actively, and keep distractions to a minimum during these conversations.
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Conclusion
Thank you for joining today's car ride conversation. These discussions can help parents and young athletes become more confident, calm, and clutch in their sports participation. If you found this helpful, subscribe to our podcast so you never miss an episode and share with others who might benefit.
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To further your understanding of building confidence and mental toughness, check out my book, "Confident, Calm, and Clutch: How to Build Confidence and Mental Toughness for Young Athletes Using Sports Psychology."
Together, let's help young athletes thrive in sports, school, and life. Until next time!
Certified Mental Performance Consultant
Resilience Trainer and Performance Expert for the Army
Author
Former D1 Softball Player
Crossfit Enthusiast
Avid Traveler and lover of food
And Awesome Auntie!